On one of the rare occasions on FB chat last week, I was pinged by a friend of mine. An artist, a writer and gentleman to boot! After some initial chit chat, he says, "Let me ask a direct question. Will you be open to the idea of a one night stand?" I was shocked and told him in no uncertain terms that I was offended. I also told him clearly, that I don't believe in one night stands. At the same time I have nothing against those who might believe in it. Each to his own, different people different circumstances, I am no one to judge anybody. He understood I was miffed and promptly told me that the question is for a survey he is doing for writing a piece! He adds, "It takes a lot of guts to say what you did, because I might have expected such an answer from someone else, not a pretty active and open-minded woman like you." I smile and sign out. The fact that I haven't screamed or beat him black & blue is only a sign of so called maturity and diplomacy as well as acceptance of the fact that many women face this on a day to day basis. A reaction I'm not proud of.
More shocking and humiliating to me than the question itself is the fact that, the so called gentlemen of our society think that they can make stupid, sly passes & get away with it. Not all but men with such mentalities seem to have weird classification for women. If a woman speaks her mind she is termed as something of a Feminist (Do they know who a feminist is?) As far as some men are concerned there are only two types of women. The woman who wear veil, drapes herself in a 9 yard, becomes fat after marriage and cannot do anything on their own beyond the kitchen or lets say without husbands approval, such a woman is not approachable because she is truly married (In their mind vis-a vis the others who are not truly married?). The other kind of woman wears what she wants, is liberated (What is liberation, wearing pants?), speaks her mind. You get the picture (for every man who can) this category is the 'Available' category, whether the woman thinks the same is of course immaterial. Don't such categories exist with men? The one who grow tummies and have far lesser brains that any woman in the house? Why should 'Fat & Foolish' be something reserved only for women and post marriage?
I read an article in the papers in the morning about how women should be grateful for the men in her life for liberating her (makes me smile) , till 8th march, morning I have read so many posts on Face Book/ Twitter about celebrating International Women's day. Some men are even offended that there is no Men's day and there’s too much noise about women's day. True perhaps except for the fact that International Women's day is hardly about the Urban Chick woman, targeted by discounts on sleeveless dresses, Salons or the discounted chocolate, ice cream for Ladies in some shops. The day is meant to highlight the cause of so many millions of women, who are till today uneducated because the men in their homes will not allow it. It is for those women, who face sexual harassment on an everyday basis from so called gentlemen not in an open way but in nasty hints that they think no one will notice. It is for those women, who have no voice to even speak of, with the confidence that I am speaking, for those women who don't even know that they have a right to be treated at par with men. Women's day, National or International OR any day for that matter is not about women being better than men. It is about highlighting the fact that, there are many such unfortunate women, who seek the basic dignity of being a human anything else is a marketing gimmick.
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