The Elephant Butt

You ! Yes you! Bending over the pool table trying to get the perfect shot. Your jeans are sliding down your butt cheeks. Oh! You meant them to be that way? Oh that is fashion and it is called Baggy Jeans? 

Well Sir, I never knew that by fashion you meant looking like an anorexic lad with no Iliac crest or for that matter no hip bone. My love, you and your other low waist baggy jeans clad dorks are a topic of discussion between me and my girls. Now before you get excited about a couple of chicks looking at you and commenting while you bend down trying to get a perfect snooker shot, let me tell you that we have a bet going on here. We are betting on how low will you let your bag called jeans fall, before you get your senses back and pull them up? Sometimes I really think, they might touch your knees. You never fail to surprise me with our outrageous fashion sense!

   

Tell me is that floral underwear you are wearing inside, good enough to be flaunted? If you think they are awesome, why not be the next superman, eh love? Belts are cheap actually and you get them even in the shop you bought those amazing low-butt jeans from. If you cannot afford it, please ask me because I am a generous young lady who can definitely spare some bucks for your pathetic little condition.

Baby, did you poop in your pants? Or are you constantly horny and fighting an erection that you want that much space down there? Honey butt crack is not sexy I tell you and no matter how sexy you are, butt crack show will always be treated with pure disgust.

   

The other day my lovely little cousin sister asked me if you are suffering from severe Diarrhea. She thinks you are wearing diapers underneath. Those Pampers and Huggies kind of diapers. I don’t wish to clear off her doubt by asking you to do a strip show because one day that poor piece of denim will naturally slip off and prove her wrong.

Mister, you are leaving a hypnotizing effect on my little brother. He has started to show off his cartoon underwear by wearing his school pants real low. He even got scolded by his English teacher for that. 

   

Ok! You want to show off your underwear, at-least wear a branded one. What? You already are? Baby, I don’t think POMA, JOCKAY, REEBUK qualify as brands. Whom are you kidding? You say they are comfortable? Then why do you pull them up in a gap of minutes? And if you are looking for space and comfort, try the Mundu way of comfort. You will even get some air down there.

Please baby, pull the pants up before they catch you and put you behind the bars. They might mistake you to be a flasher. The wind has been kind to you till now but who knows, one strong breeze and your manhood might be out for the public to judge. 

   

I don’t mind baggy jeans as long as they don’t show me your butt crack. This post isn’t for you if your jeans are low waist and not low butt. This post is not directed towards you if you keep your underwear hidden and not trying desperately to flaunt your nonexistent flat butt.

  

   

 Also if you can’t afford a belt, get a rope!