30 More days and I'll be Gone

Yes Im counting..

Dear Blog,

I have 30 days left for me to live this life..

30 days after today ill be lying in a hospital bed, waiting for a doctor to come and take my breath away, My pain away.. The pain in which ive lived for years..

I don't know what it would feel like to live a life without pain.. But i don't have another option.. I'm not happily waiting for 30 days to fly away and to meet my doctor.. He will take my pain away for few days and maybe he will lead me to another road of pain which will last forever.. And that's not the kind of life that anybody would ever wish for.. Then again I'm not just anyone but me..

I don't think i have ever been so scared before..

But Its ok, I'm gonna take a pill for the stomach cramps, and take another when that doesn't work..

Me,

Waiting..